'There is nothing worse than tanlines.'

5 Comments:

Blogger sparkleMatrix:

I do not know - how you dare, go out looking like that! You are a disgrace to “femininity”

 

 
Blogger Phemisaurus Terribilis:

Yeah, well, waddaya 'xpect me to do?
Wear tooth floss for a bikini?

Hey, maybe that's not such a bad idea!
Only thing is: do I dress left or right?
I mean, you know -- oh, for pity's sake, do I have to spell it out?
I don't have a butt crack, so, the floss, which side of the tail?

 

 
Blogger sparkleMatrix:

Errr actually, I was more thinking about the size of THOSE hips and the cellulite. So I would give the tooth floss bikini a miss. Another thing have you thought about implants?

 

 
Blogger Phemisaurus Terribilis:

The doctor says if I got implants in proportion to my hips my center of gravity would shift. I'm not sure I know what he means, but apparently I would topple over and spend a lot of time at the dentist's.

 

 
Anonymous Army of Me:

If you need advice on any aspect of detailed body scrutiny, always ask one of the species known as Poleaphallic Denialtops. They have known for ages that the best and cheapest outfit, and one that prevents really obvious tan lines in total nudity.

But, if you really must wear something, as mentioned above, the cheapest place to shop for your outfits is the chemist for plasters and floss, (these 2 are all you really need, even if just shopping or going out- and also Primark has a good line in cheap but sexy dino-wear lingerie.

The floss can also be used for your teeth, but in-the-know dancer dinos have already discovered (as seen below in another dino-pic) that the dinostripper stilettos can double-up as a toothpick too!

It's so much fun being a Poleaphallic Denialtops!

 

 

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