'You have a choice of spoon or fork.'

4 comments  - read  /reply

'The views expressed by this club are those
of the club alone and do not necessarily
represent those of Phemisaurus.'

7 comments  - read  /reply

'You can't argue with the laws of nature
...this is you here, by the way.'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'Stop laughing!'

1 comments  - read  /reply

'Neutrality. It works for me.'

0 comments  - read  /reply

'Damn, you look good in that little number.'

2 comments  - read  /reply

'Well? What more evidence do
you need for your inferiority?'

0 comments  - read  /reply

'Yeah. But. What is pain anyway?
I mean, it's so difficult to define.'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'Stop oppressing me,
I have a right to clean my feet!'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'And that's where this stuff, whatyamacallit,
consent comes in. Now where did I put it?'

6 comments  - read  /reply

'You'll be safe in there, my little morsel.
Never can be too careful, what with all
them man-eating dinos about.'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'Waiter! There's a penis in my soup.'

3 comments  - read  /reply

'Ewww, that's totally gross!
Look at the disgusting growth on that one!'

12 comments  - read  /reply

'Oh, goody, it's finally here!
Phemi's waited ages for this one.'

4 comments  - read  /reply

'Smile!'

5 comments  - read  /reply

'Don't look at me like that.
I'm a pro-meat vegan.'







Concept by Nectarine

12 comments  - read  /reply

'Where's the expiry date on this thing?'

11 comments  - read  /reply

'Huh? Where? What privilege?'

6 comments  - read  /reply

'Nah mate, my erection problem
is a tad bit different from yours,
but thanks for the advice anyhow.'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'This demonstration will teach you everything you
need to know about objectivity in the mass media.
Basically, I club you over the head. Then, when I'm

finished, you can club me over the head an equal
number of times.'

4 comments  - read  /reply

'There is nothing worse than tanlines.'

5 comments  - read  /reply

Professor Terribilis says:
'Never underestimate the importance of
laughing your oppressor in the face'

1 comments  - read  /reply

'Granted, post-modernism is somewhat difficult
to explain, but all you need to remember is that
you are a man of agency and you can choose
how to feel about being clubbed over the head'.

6 comments  - read  /reply

'Sir, we have your test results back. The diagnosis is, as we suspected, Chauvanitis Pigisoma and the prognosis... well, ahem, why don't you take a seat first.'

10 comments  - read  /reply

'So, your need to dominate is genetically
determined, is it? Then I'm afraid I don't have
a cure, but, on the bright side, I can ensure that
you don't pass it on to the next generation.'

3 comments  - read  /reply

'Let me get this straight,
you are his best friend
and he did that to you?'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'Wait 'til I tell you about this great new diet I found.'

2 comments  - read  /reply

'Well, it's your own stupid fault if it hurts.
I told you to keep still.
Why can't you just relax and enjoy it?'

5 comments  - read  /reply

'OK, so, I have embarrasing hair growth, like, all over,
but will you love me anyway, please, please, please?'

8 comments  - read  /reply

'Mate, this must be some sort of misunderstanding.
I mean, isn't this "lift & separate" thingymajiggy
better suited to those dangly bits between your legs?'

5 comments  - read  /reply

'Of course I take you seriously, schmoopsie-poo.'

1 comments  - read  /reply

'Don't look so worried.
I'm just going to exercise my freedom of speech.'

9 comments  - read  /reply

'What do you mean, you don't want a lap dance?'

2 comments  - read  /reply

'I really don't mind anal sex.
It's not painful at all.'

1 comments  - read  /reply

'I always try to put myself in men's position.'

3 comments  - read  /reply

'Here's me giving head.
He said I was doing it wrong.
Something about the teeth.'

6 comments  - read  /reply

'I tried lipstick.
It gave me dinorrhoea.'

1 comments  - read  /reply

'Stilettos?
Fabulous for those hard to reach places.'

0 comments  - read  /reply

'Because I'm worth i-
Huh? On my teeth?
Oh, how embarassing.'

1 comments  - read  /reply

with the kind permission of Sparkle*Matrix

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